I wish you would stop scaring me.
It's a big, wide world, with plenty of other people you could bother.
But everytime I turn around, there you are, watching me with your beady little eyes.
I know you create beautiful, intricate webs that some people consider miraculous.
And I've been told that your sticky webs can be useful to humans.
But you spin them in places I need to go, and when I get there, they cling to my face!
I know you help rid the world of pesky insects.
You eat filthy flies and poky mosquitoes.
But I feel sorry for the poor bug that is wrapped like a burrito in your web, because if I was smaller, that tasty wrap could have been me.
I know you don’t want to hurt me.
You’re only dangerous when you feel threatened.
But you nearly give me a heart attack every time I see you, which isn't good for my health.
I know your venom can help people.
It can even prevent brain damage in some people.
But I don't want your venom in me. You bit me once, and it itched for days.
I know spiders are useful.
And there are plenty of nice ones around.
But I still think you should start seeing other people.
A. Rakno Phobic